Inspiration

Wow, I just reread what I wrote on that last post.  It makes me seem like a crazy person.  And I sort of have been feeling like a crazy person lately due to the hormones I am taking to fight my "endometriosis."  So I'm going off of them.  It's not worth it to me to feel like that all of the time.  I know there is the possibility that it might grow back or that it make it harder for us to get pregnant in the future.  But like I said before, we aren't even sure how we feel about that topic so there's no point in making myself miserable in the meantime. 


For those who don't know what endometriosis is, it basically means that the tissue that is supposed to grow inside of your uterus (and help if you were to conceive a child, etc.) decides to start growing in places it shouldn't be growing.  In my case, that meant the outside of my uterine wall, my bladder, and a few other areas.  I don't think it hit me originally what all of it meant, but now I know that like my hubby, I am going to be dealing with this in one form or another for the rest of my life (or at least a good portion of it).  Which is why it was so incredibly frustrating to me when I was dealing with anxiety, mood swings, sleepless nights, cramping legs, memory issues, and all kinds of other lovely things.  When I got all the way to my son's school this morning and THEN realized that I had forgot his backpack for school and had to turn around and do it all over again, I realized enough was enough.  I talked to the doctor and we will just monitor things frequently to see how it is going and go from there.  So I hope to be more human again in a few weeks once everything is back out of my system. ;)


Yesterday, I had the day off from work and while my son was taking a nap, I watched the movie "Julie & Julia."  I found it quite fascinating, and as I sat there watching these two women's stories unfold, I was reminded of two main things.  One was that I should blog more often (!) and the second had to do with inspiration.  I want to inspire people, and I want to be inspired.  I don't want to wake up and mechanically go through the day like one long episode of Groundhog's Day.  It's not worth it.  Sure, life can be monotonous at times, but it's all about what you make of it.  So now I'm on a quest to find my inspiration (and hopefully to inspire others along the way).  These two strong women portrayed in Julie & Julia each took a passion and made it happen - ha - and I hope to follow in their footsteps soon.  I don't know where or how my life will unfold as a result, but I'm looking forward to seeing how the next year progresses.  I am determined to have 2010 be an amazing year, and I already have many blessings to look forward to (Florida trip in March, beach trip in May, and hopefully cruisetour of Alaska in July).  I am one lucky ducky! 


Now if only I could get my attitude in check!  :)