Confessions about Me

Here are a few things you need to know about me to start off this new blog:

1) I am turning 30 in exactly two months and one day and for some reason it has really gotten under my skin!

2) I plan to write things on here that are on my mind and will change names and things to keep my identity (and the identity of those I discuss) secret. Some of the things I say may not be pretty but you don't have to like them and I welcome comments because discussion is healthy.

3) My relationship with my mother is virtually non-existent. No matter how hard I try she is not going to change and she is not willing to see things any other way than her own. So I have an interesting balance in trying to stay involved in my parents' lives without ruining my own.

4) I am not one of those people that is satisfied with being average. I'm totally okay with other people being average if that's what makes them happy - I just can't let myself be average. I am always pushing for more, trying to challenge myself further, and generally not okay with the status quo. It's just me and it's my biggest strength and my biggest weakness.

5) I have an amazing husband who I have been married to for nearly 5 years as well as a 3 year old son. I couldn't ask for a better family life in that respect, but our life is far from perfect either. I feel very blessed with the family God has given me especially given my #3 situation above.

6) I love to dance - just about everywhere and anytime. Now don't get dirty and think I mean stripping or pole dancing or something like that. Just the other cool kinds like jazz, hip-hop, tap, at weddings, at the club, in my car, with my son, etc. I HATE ballet although I respect *most* people who do it because I know how difficult it is - I just hate how slow it is and don't have the appreciation for it that I should because I don't enjoy doing it myself.

7) I am an only child - this makes #3 even more difficult. I liked being an only child growing up and even don't really mind it all that much now. That's why I am okay with my son possibly being an only child. That topic is still up for debate, but I'm okay with it if we decide to stick with one and know the benefits for him if he ends up being an only child.

8) I am constantly evolving (see #4) and because of this I have had several "careers" in my life and still not sure if the one I am in (3.5+ years and counting) is the one that will stick. Mainly because I feel like I've hit a rut in my job (or my company not sure which) and don't know how to get out of it. This is something I will probably write about more soon because it is on my mind a lot right now.

9) I still have a few close friends from high school, a few from college, and a few from work life. I am kind of shy at first but am outgoing once I know people, and I am friendly most of the time and make friends easily. I just don't trust people too much because I've been burned several times.

10) I have done some things in my early adult life that I am not 100% proud of but know that God was watching over me and saved me from a lot. I am overall a good kid though - always have been, always will be. I can have lots of fun without drinking, but I can appreciate a good glass of wine or mojito now and then. I like who I am and know that all of my experiences (good and bad) make up who I am.

11) I am a big believer in "everything happens for a reason" - I have to be given all of the great and/or crazy things that have happened to me in my life. I know God has a plan for me and I'm just hoping I can fulfill my dreams one day (once I figure out exactly what those are). I worry a lot about money and being taken care of, but then I remember that everything will be okay if I just give it time and pray about it.

12) I'm obsessed with weddings. Really, I think I just enjoy party-planning in general and weddings happen the most often. But I like to help my friends/coworkers find a great deal or come up with creative ideas on a budget. There is nothing I like more than finding something amazing without paying a fortune for it. I am not artistic but I am creative, and I love that because I am blessed to have some more artistic friends who can help follow through the idea if I can't seem to create what's in my head.

13) My lucky number is 13 so I will stop after this one! I spend a LOT of time in the car in traffic, but I've learned to use this time as time to think and process things from the day (on the way home) or to jam out to music and relax. I take a dance class two nights per week by my work so that helps me to avoid traffic on those evenings at least, but otherwise it is the bane of my existence. If I could have that 1.5-2 hours back a day, I would be so much happier, but such is life and money doesn't grow on trees so we live farther away in the suburbs which is enjoyable on the evenings and weekends. You can't have it all unfortunately!

More to come soon!!! I look forward to confessing to you (and hope to get some readers soon!)!